Benjamin Sawyers

APPEARANCE

FACECLAIM: Jeffrey Dean Morgan
HEIGHT: 188cm
HAIR COLOR: Dark brown, going grey
EYE COLOR: Brown
BODY TYPE: Skinny/lean, but strong and flexible. Used to be a lil chub before prison.
SCARS: A couple of faded ones from fights
NOTABLE FEATURES: Deep, warm voice - but a gaze that tends to be cold. Wears glasses.

 

RELATIONSHIPS

SEXUALITY: Just sexual
ROMANTIC: Aromantic
SPOUSE: Angelina Sawyers, deceased
PARENTS: Gavin & Tarah Sawyers
SIBLINGS: No
CHILDREN: Anthony & Thomas

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HEALTH

ADDICTIONS: Drama and adrenaline probably
SMOKES / ALCOHOL / DRUGS: Yes / Yes / Won’t say no
PHYSICAL AILMENTS: None
MENTAL AILMENTS: Depression, anxiety, agoraphobia, claustrophobia

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PERSONALITY

NEGATIVE TRAITS: Suspicious and trusts no one, egocentric and selfish, aggressive and easily gets super pissed off and violent, cold, insensitive, lacking in empathy, no regret or shame or bad conscience, easily bored, emotionally distanced from others, reserved and needs time for himself
POSITIVE TRAITS: Optimist, social, outgoing, cheerful, smiles and laughs a lot, helpful, polite, confident, assertive, frank, calm, strong, brave, does enjoy the company and intimacy of others even if he is emotionally distanced. 
BAD HABITS: Manipulates and annoys others only because it’s fun
LIKES: Beer, cigars, sex, yoga, succulents, macrame
DISLIKES: His intrusive thoughts about murder and violence

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MORE PERSONALITY

Benjamin loves meeting people even if he’s actually an introvert. He is outgoing and it’s easy for him to talk to other people. On top of that, he’s very nice, a laugh is never far away and he’s often seen with a smile on his features as the positive person he is. However, not everyone might enjoy him since he is very strong as a person and very straightforward with his thoughts and opinions. Or you can just see him as secure, as he has a calm and stable energy. If someone needs help, he will be there immediately and asks if they need something. He gives of himself to others and never feels anything is awkward.  

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Even if he enjoys hanging around people, he is suspicious and barely trusts anyone - and it was that way even before the world turned to shit. He believes the worst about most, but appears like he believes the best. Since he isn’t in tune with other people’s emotions he can become extremely cold and like he doesn’t care at all when people are upset - which is true to a degree. He doesn’t understand or care. But he has since long learned how other people do when someone is sad and tries to comfort others. 

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Another thing he has learned is to control his anger. Benjamin might be stable, but if he gets angry he will become super pissed off and violent. He has pushed his mom down a set of stairs, thrown an ashtray at another student so they needed stitches, almost killed a friend with a shovel, etc. He’s not as bad anymore, but someone might get a fist planted in the face when  there are no rules anymore. 

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Benjamin has blunted emotions and never really experiences them to 100% (except maybe anger). He has never been in love, but he can love someone in his own way. Of course, he can like other people, but he never loves them, which goes for his family as well. However, he is loyal if he finds someone he has decided is his and takes care of the relationship if the person gives him something. It can be something so simple as keeping him from being bored or just making it easier for him to act “normal”. 

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He absolutely hates being bored and needs to have something to do at all times, or he will most likely turn into the asshole he can be. Same if he doesn’t get to be alone - he’ll get aggressive and make sure people leave him the fuck alone. It’s where he thrives.

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BACKSTORY

TW: Animal abuse and death, murder, abuse.

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There was abuse and neglection from his parents when Benjamin was a child. Nothing over the top with lasting bruises and broken bones - but a slap and angry yelling when he did wrong, and even when he did right. To say that a frustration began to grow at an early age is an understatement. Benjamin was a rather cruel child with a short temper, was violent to his classmates and teachers, and even the family’s pet. Other small animals became victims to his both frustration and fascination with blood and death. He killed them and felt nothing except for excitement. 

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Believe it or not, Benjamin actually calmed down a lot and learned how to behave more properly around others. In high school, he was even one of the popular kids, albeit still violent and an asshole - but a smooth one. His grades weren’t the best. He didn’t care. He had stopped hurting animals, though, but the fantasies of killing were sort of always there.

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Despite fights and the grades and his inability to focus for very long on the same subject, Benjamin did get into college and even finished, but with a few struggles because of boredom. At this time, he also found the “love of his life”, whom he married and had two sons with. Benjamin had never been good with relationships, but somehow she put up with him and would continue to do so despite him being detached.

Benjamin first acted on his fantasies about killing in college. He had planned it for years, and finally, the urge became too strong. Turns out, it was incredibly thrilling and made him feel extremely powerful. He seemed to go into a trance.

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He knew it was wrong, but the killing continued. He didn’t care. Not often, though. Benjamin had a cool down period with 2-4 years in between each kill. He had his studies, family, and a nice job to keep up with too. Not to mention he was a well-liked individual in the community, often helping out neighbors with whatever they needed help with. No one knew about his ‘hobby’. He was such a kind person after all. His family never suspected a thing. 

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Between ages 32 and 36 he killed a lot more often than he had before. The death count went up.

The last murder was committed when he was 38, his 16th victim. He lost interest and moved on. The police had, of course, tried to solve the cases since the very first murder and had even talked to Benjamin a couple of years before. It took another two years after the last murder for them to get Benjamin, but only for one of the murders. Benjamin confessed everything without the slightest regret or shame in his body, and could without a problem tell the court how he had done it and that he had killed eight more people, what date, where the bodies were. In court, he talked about it like any mundane thing, with a couple of amused laughs.

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Even if Benjamin only was convicted for nine of his claimed 16 murders, he ended up on death row for execution.

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A cell no larger than a shoebox. 22 hours a day are spent inside of it, and during the weekends, 24 hours. No TV. At the beginning, not even a radio. Body visitations every day that meant standing naked in front of others. Barely any social contact. People who scream in the cells during the nights, who speak crazy talk, who throw shit at the guards, who commit suicide. Bad air. Bad food. Not such a great life, in other words, maybe not even for a serial killer. He also got diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder with narcissistic traits. 

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He did get visits at times. By his wife, his youngest son, by media, by psychologists, by people within the judicial system. By producers, by writers, by journalists. He got letters from fans. He starred in documentaries, interviews, reportages, and books.

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However, that’s not enough to keep you alive at death row. As time went by, Benjamin got worse and worse, and quieter for every visit. It took longer time to warm up and speak. Getting out of the cell caused anxiety. The few inmates he had heard killing themselves were quite inspiring after a while, and Benjamin longed for the execution day.

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Luckily for him, that day never came before the world turned to shit. 

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THE START OF THE APOCALYPSE UNTIL NOW

Who the hell prioritizes to inform inmates at death row? No one, probably. Benjamin had no idea that something serious had gone down until a couple of months later. One by one, the staff seemed to disappear until the cells opened and the prison was empty but all the inmates. Of course, fights began to rise and some people died until they figured out how they should operate together, still unknowing of what had happened outside. It wasn’t until much later they managed to get the hell out, just to meet death. 

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More people died. Panic broke out. Even Benjamin became a bit nervous, but managed to keep his cool as per usual in most situations. He mostly found the new world totally cool since it finally allowed him to go outside that crap place and he was free again. The dead smelled gross, but otherwise he thought they were interesting.

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Other survivors found the prison later on and joined the rest of the inmates that were still there. No one really recognized Benjamin out of them. In the end, he left the prison together with a group of survivors and his skills as a surgeon were very appreciated.